Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Where have I been?

*note: all new 365 posts have been backdated*

I have fallen a bit behind on my 365 posts. Last Tuesday evening, we received the news that Tommie's grandpa passed away. He had been battling bone cancer since late August of last year. He was placed in a nursing home two days before Thanksgiving because he was no longer able to care for himself at home, so we knew the time would be short. At Christmas when we visited him, we knew it would be the last time we would spend time with him. Even when we know that time is short and that death is imminent, it still takes us by surprise. You know the day is coming when you will get a phone call, but the call itself is still like a punch to the gut. No matter how prepared you are, it still hurts.

(Thanksgiving 2009)

Last weekend, I was scheduled to go to Dallas for a fun weekend visit. On Wednesday, I spent the whole day canceling those plans and making new plans to travel to Illinois for the funeral instead. We are grateful that we live close enough that attending the funeral was an option. We spent the next several days preparing to travel and working out the details. Our plan was to travel on Saturday morning (the funeral was Sunday) and return home on Monday. Somehow, we had a miscommunication with Tommie's parents and they thought we were coming on Friday. So, on Friday afternoon at 3:40, we made the decision to travel that night. Tommie came home from work right away and we packed up in a flurry and left town by 6 p.m. We arrived at his parents' house at 12:30 a.m. on Saturday. Saturday, we spent the day with Tommie's parents and his brother's family.


Sunday, we had brunch with Tommie's parents and headed out of town (1 hour drive) for the services. A visitation was held from 1-3, with a graveside service at 3. Grandpa Barker chose to be cremated, so the visitation was truly that - a chance to visit with long-lost friends and family that we'd never met. I "borrowed" my father-in-law's *beautiful* camera (Nikon D90) and took almost 200 photos that day. After the graveside service, we all had a meal together at the Senior Center (where we usually have our family gatherings).



I know that Grandpa Barker will always hold a special place in our hearts and that he will be greatly missed. He was the last surviving grandpa for both Tommie & I. Since I've been in the family for 13 years and lived much closer to Grandpa Barker than I ever did to my own grandfathers, he was truly like a grandpa to me too. I truly hope that my boys will remember spending time with him too.

  (Labor Day 2008) 

Tommie has always talked about going golfing with his grandpa. One of my favorite memories is when we had a family gathering at his house and we were playing spoons. I'm pretty sure something got broken that day, but Grandpa took it all in stride. He never said a whole lot at gatherings (probably couldn't get a word in edgewise), but I know he was so proud of his grandson.

(Christmas 2007)
We'll miss you, Grandpa!

2 comments:

Julie said...

My Granddaddy had bone cancer.

So glad you took the family picture with him the last time you visited! It will mean so much and be a good memory.

In His Grip said...

I am so glad you have had memories with him and that your children knew him. Don't take that for granted. Sorry Friend, M-